Memories
I just spent the last hour or so cleaning out my closet (non clothes items), mostly my jewelry (what little I have) and a few shoe boxes of old memories. I love going through all my old memories. Mainly I save things like letters (back when people wrote letters) and other small things like tickets to places I've been, postcards, and a few other very small trinkets.
Anyway, i definitely took a trip down memory lane today. It actually felt pretty good. My favorite box contained pretty much all my letters and notes from middle school and high school. I only re-read a few, otherwise I would have been there for hours, but it was enough to make me smile and bring back things I had forgotten. Anyway, it was just nice for once to look back to my high school days with joy instead of anger. I moved to va in 10th grade, and it was definitely not a good move for me. Jumping into the middle of high school didnt make it easy to connect with people. Not to mention the fact that it was the first non-DoDDs school I had been to since, I think, 2nd grade. Which I didnt think would be a big deal, but what I found out was this. Kids are clique-y. I just hadnt experienced that a whole lot. I mean, I was used to an environment in which every year about half (if not more) of the school was brand new. Everyone had to make friends fast, and for the most part, you werent picky or exclusive. People were friends on some level with almost everyone. For instance, when I was in 9th grade and living in Germany (my first and only year in Heidelberg), I got to know tons of people. And when people got together to hang out, it was pretty much an open invitation, we'd walk around town and jsut gather up whoever was around. Now maybe the fact that everyone lived literally on-top of everyone else (in apartments), which put us all in close proximity to each other had a lot to do with it. But still, even when we got to school, things didnt change. You ate lunch with whoever you wanted, at whatever table you wanted... no big deal. But then came herndon. And people had their friends, and apparently werent all that interested in making new ones. I mean, most people were nice to me in class, but no one ever thought to include me in anything outside of school. The year I got there, I was one of about 8 new people in the ENTIRE school. (not to mention that this school was bigger than all three of the previous high schools I had been to put together). Anyway, it was tough, but I managed to get through it. And I did end up make a few friends along the way, mostly from work (starbucks was good for something), but it certainly wasnt easy. And I think ever since then I've had a pretty tough time when it comes to making connections with people I meet. But after I graduated I basically deleted high school from my memory as much as possible, I now consider most of it to have been one long, bad dream. So it was nice today to find some positive memories.
It's a good thing I dont throw out absolutely everything.
Anyway, i definitely took a trip down memory lane today. It actually felt pretty good. My favorite box contained pretty much all my letters and notes from middle school and high school. I only re-read a few, otherwise I would have been there for hours, but it was enough to make me smile and bring back things I had forgotten. Anyway, it was just nice for once to look back to my high school days with joy instead of anger. I moved to va in 10th grade, and it was definitely not a good move for me. Jumping into the middle of high school didnt make it easy to connect with people. Not to mention the fact that it was the first non-DoDDs school I had been to since, I think, 2nd grade. Which I didnt think would be a big deal, but what I found out was this. Kids are clique-y. I just hadnt experienced that a whole lot. I mean, I was used to an environment in which every year about half (if not more) of the school was brand new. Everyone had to make friends fast, and for the most part, you werent picky or exclusive. People were friends on some level with almost everyone. For instance, when I was in 9th grade and living in Germany (my first and only year in Heidelberg), I got to know tons of people. And when people got together to hang out, it was pretty much an open invitation, we'd walk around town and jsut gather up whoever was around. Now maybe the fact that everyone lived literally on-top of everyone else (in apartments), which put us all in close proximity to each other had a lot to do with it. But still, even when we got to school, things didnt change. You ate lunch with whoever you wanted, at whatever table you wanted... no big deal. But then came herndon. And people had their friends, and apparently werent all that interested in making new ones. I mean, most people were nice to me in class, but no one ever thought to include me in anything outside of school. The year I got there, I was one of about 8 new people in the ENTIRE school. (not to mention that this school was bigger than all three of the previous high schools I had been to put together). Anyway, it was tough, but I managed to get through it. And I did end up make a few friends along the way, mostly from work (starbucks was good for something), but it certainly wasnt easy. And I think ever since then I've had a pretty tough time when it comes to making connections with people I meet. But after I graduated I basically deleted high school from my memory as much as possible, I now consider most of it to have been one long, bad dream. So it was nice today to find some positive memories.
It's a good thing I dont throw out absolutely everything.
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